I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize
