i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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