You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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