Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
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