His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
