Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You smell like stripper and shame
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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