I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
