Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I had to cum in my sink.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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