Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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