we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
