ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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