you turned your livingroom into a bong?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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