Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize