I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
