i just wanna soil my oats bro
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
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i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
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Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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