I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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