So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
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She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
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I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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