yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
