And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
