Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
