You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
