You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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