What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I have fence marks all over my body
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
