Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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