dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Randomize
