i think my mom watched the whole time
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Ketchup is God's man juice
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize