Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Two words: blizzard sex
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