I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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