so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
