he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual