Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis

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  (734): turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis http://tfl.nu/zgff
  Replies (64) Good night (8047) Bad night (822)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.

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  (630): my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone. http://tfl.nu/0m3h
  Replies (24) Good night (1634) Bad night (4431)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win

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  (609): Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win http://tfl.nu/6ut9
  Replies (43) Good night (715) Bad night (4074)
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  (716): View more from New York

  ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.

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  (716): ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck. http://tfl.nu/am3q
  Replies (7) Good night (1512) Bad night (2708)
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  (925): View more from California

  He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.

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  (925): He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle. http://tfl.nu/x2qg
  Replies (11) Good night (1638) Bad night (2108)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.

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  (832): Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test. http://tfl.nu/gs8m
  Replies (3) Good night (619) Bad night (1451)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.

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  (815): I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good. http://tfl.nu/gzj9
  Replies (6) Good night (570) Bad night (983)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight

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  (540): There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight http://tfl.nu/g8si
  Replies (0) Good night (1016) Bad night (584)
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  (949): View more from California

  I hate that we are older than the real world people now

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  (949): I hate that we are older than the real world people now http://tfl.nu/6lpg
  Replies (3) Good night (710) Bad night (503)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches

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  (832): I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches http://tfl.nu/e6l8
  Replies (0) Good night (1136) Bad night (272)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.

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  (304): Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid. http://tfl.nu/agyj
  Replies (2) Good night (311) Bad night (432)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster

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  (612): Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster http://tfl.nu/akj8
  Replies (2) Good night (304) Bad night (410)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.

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  (508): I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer. http://tfl.nu/b5d7
  Replies (0) Good night (398) Bad night (292)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.

  (716): View more from New York

  The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers

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  (716): Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one. (716): The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers http://tfl.nu/7hy9
  Replies (5) Good night (668) Bad night (351)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.

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  (613): His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers. http://tfl.nu/iwq4
  Replies (1) Good night (525) Bad night (145)

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