I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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