That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
