I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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