K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
