it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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