It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
