how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell