This dress was meant to end up on your floor
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Randomize
