So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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