A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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