its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
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