If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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