why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
