smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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