I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize