And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
