I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize