dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize
