I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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