Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Randomize