Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Princesses don't give blow jobs
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize